Orhan Pamuk, Turkish writer, Nobel Prize winner, wrote in his collection of essays, "Other Colors", that people capable of happiness are either stupid or evil. My heart skipped a beat when I read that. But he follows with a lighter thought: that, perhaps being happy is not vulgar, that it actually "takes brains".
I began to wonder how many of my friends and acquaintances are happy. And what does that mean, to be happy? Is it just being cheerful? Or is there another layer, something more like joy perhaps? And how do we find that? Most people I know seem to lead lives that settle around a certain emotional centre of gravity. There are some who seem to be struggling with a terrible anger. Others flattened by depression. Some seem emotionally disconnected (I believe most of us probably have disowned shadow aspects). Some seem actually joyous. Happy. The whole gamut.
How do we develop our emotional set point, our emotional centre of gravity? Is it partly in the genes? Somehow connected to the collective genetic pool? In terms of the physicality of their face, why is it that some people can smile :) more easily, while others can frown :( and lower the corners of their mouths more easily? So perhaps partly biology, chemicals, and hormones. And perhaps it is partly environmental factors: emotional zones at work, play, or home; the techno-economic base we live in. Perhaps it is partly personal choices, and brains, and thinking. Good heavens, thinking! And maybe--not thinking! What about various spiritual practices? Or is there something else too? So then, all of it?
Now the big question: can we shift that emotional set point? Is it possible? How?
Complex. Complicated. So many factors to consider.
I believe it is possible--in my case it took probably at least five years of conscious effort, with lots of setbacks. It takes work and hope, and like Orhan, I believe it takes brains.
I began to wonder how many of my friends and acquaintances are happy. And what does that mean, to be happy? Is it just being cheerful? Or is there another layer, something more like joy perhaps? And how do we find that? Most people I know seem to lead lives that settle around a certain emotional centre of gravity. There are some who seem to be struggling with a terrible anger. Others flattened by depression. Some seem emotionally disconnected (I believe most of us probably have disowned shadow aspects). Some seem actually joyous. Happy. The whole gamut.
How do we develop our emotional set point, our emotional centre of gravity? Is it partly in the genes? Somehow connected to the collective genetic pool? In terms of the physicality of their face, why is it that some people can smile :) more easily, while others can frown :( and lower the corners of their mouths more easily? So perhaps partly biology, chemicals, and hormones. And perhaps it is partly environmental factors: emotional zones at work, play, or home; the techno-economic base we live in. Perhaps it is partly personal choices, and brains, and thinking. Good heavens, thinking! And maybe--not thinking! What about various spiritual practices? Or is there something else too? So then, all of it?
Now the big question: can we shift that emotional set point? Is it possible? How?
Complex. Complicated. So many factors to consider.
I believe it is possible--in my case it took probably at least five years of conscious effort, with lots of setbacks. It takes work and hope, and like Orhan, I believe it takes brains.
At least.
Mr. Snaredrumhead;
ReplyDeleteI often this about this, and the difference between joy and happiness. Personally, I think it has a lot to do with gratitude. That's my starting point.
Great post.
RKB